🕯️ 5 Real-Life Signer Horror Stories (and How to Avoid Them)

People think notarizations are boring. Most of the time, they are — until they’re not.

In Oregon, I’ve seen everything from signings done in half-finished basements to documents covered in cat paw prints. As a mobile notary, I’ve learned that if it can happen, it probably will — usually right after I say, “This should only take ten minutes.”

So, gather ‘round. It’s spooky season, and I’ve got stories.

🐔 1. The One With the Chicken

It was supposed to be a simple travel consent form. I arrive, set up my clipboard, and out of nowhere comes the sound of clucking — loud, persistent, and very close.

The signer smiles. “Don’t mind her, she’s part of the family.”
Enter: a live chicken. On the table. Watching every move I make.

Apparently, she was the “emotional support animal.” I don’t judge, but I did have to gently explain that witnesses have to be human.

We finished the signing while the chicken pecked at the corner of a notary stamp I now keep as a memento.

Lesson learned: When someone says they have “one witness,” always clarify the species.

📦 2. The Moving Truck Signing

If there’s one thing about mobile notarization in Tillamook County, it’s that I go where the people are — and sometimes, they’re mid-move.

This particular signer had packed everything. We’re talking boxes stacked to the ceiling, Wi-Fi unplugged, house echoing like a haunted cave.
So where did we end up signing?
The back of a U-Haul, with a cardboard box for a desk and a camping lantern for light.

Every few minutes, a gust of wind would slam the truck door, and both of us would jump like we were in a horror film.

Lesson learned: Notarizations can happen almost anywhere, but the back of a moving vehicle is still low on the list of “ideal settings.”

💍 3. The Engagement Surprise

I thought I was there to notarize a simple affidavit. Halfway through, the signer starts fidgeting, looking between me, the paper, and their partner. I assume it’s nerves — until they drop to one knee.

Right there, in the middle of the notarization.
Ring out. Tears. Applause from absolutely no one but me and my stamp.

I wasn’t sure whether to congratulate them or finish the acknowledgment first. I went with both.

Lesson learned: When you’re a notary, expect surprises. And apparently, proposals.

🌧️ 4. The Rain-Soaked Refinance

If you’ve ever lived on the Oregon Coast, you know “covered porch” doesn’t mean much in October. The signer insisted it’d be fine — “we’ll be under the awning!”

By page three, the awning was dripping like a leaky faucet. By page five, the wind blew half the packet off the table. By page six, we gave up and turned my car into a mobile office.

The heater fogged the windows, the dog barked from inside, and I couldn’t help but laugh. It looked less like a signing and more like we were conspiring.

Lesson learned: Weatherproof your documents — or at least have a Plan B that doesn’t involve soggy loan paperwork.

🧙 5. The Backseat Ritual

Late evening. Rural road. A signer texts that they’ll “just be in the car.” Fine, I think. Quick job.

I walk up, and they’re sitting in the backseat surrounded by crystals, incense, and what I can only describe as “manifestation energy.” They tell me they’re “charging the document” before signing.

I nodded, because what else do you do? The signature glowed (maybe from the candlelight, maybe from sheer spiritual power), and the job was done.

Lesson learned: Notarizing in Oregon means expecting a little weirdness — and occasionally sage smoke.

✨ The Happy Ending

These stories make me laugh now, but in the moment, they were pure chaos. Every signer has their quirks, every setting has its challenges, and every notary has a story that sounds made up until you’ve been there.

The key to avoiding your own signer horror story?
Be prepared, stay flexible, and if all else fails — have a flashlight, a towel, and a sense of humor.

✍️ Book with Northwest Notary On The Go — bringing clarity and confidence to every signature (chickens welcome, but not as witnesses).